Don't go there! (now, define what you mean by there)

Jerry: Tina, you are ... [reads cards] ... an existentialist, is that right?

Tina: That's right, Jerry. And Louis is, too.

Jerry: And what did you want to tell Louis today?

Tina: Jerry, today I want to tell him ...

Jerry: Talk to Louis. Talk to him. [Crowd hushes.]

Tina: Louis ... I've loved you for a long time ...

Louis: I love you, too, Tina.

Tina: Louis, you know I agree with you that existence precedes essence, but ... well, I just want to tell you I've been reading Nietzsche lately, and I don't think I can agree with your egalitarian politics any more.

Crowd: Wooooo! Woooooo!

Louis: [shocked and disbelieving] Tina, this is crazy. You know that Sartre clarified all this way back in the 40s.

Tina: But he didn't take into account Nietzsche's radical critique of democratic morality, Louis. I'm sorry. I can't ignore the contradiction any longer!

Louis: You got these ideas from Victor, didn't you? Didn't you?

Tina: Don't you bring up Victor! I only turned to him when I saw you were seeing that dominatrix! I needed a real man! An Uber-man!

Louis: [sobbing] I couldn't help it. It was my burden of freedom. It was too much!

A full transcript can be found here. Via Ezra at Pandagon, in honour of Jesse's new job working for Jerry Springer.