Swivel, swivel, swivel

It must be a strange time to be a European Parliament correspondent for a British newspaper. After years of seeing your earnestly researched dispatches over the latest debates about fisheries policy end up as a single paragraph in the 'other foreign news' section, you can now get an entire page to yourself thanks to the swivel-eyed loons:

Nominated by UKIP for the Parliament's Women's Rights Committee, Godfrey Bloom, newly elected MEP for Yorkshire and Humberside, made a bizarre series of comments that seemed destined to dent his party's credibility as a serious political force.

Speaking on the fringes of a press conference Mr Bloom joked that women "don't clean behind the fridge enough'' adding: "I would represent Yorkshire women who always have dinner on the table when you come home.''

As the episode reached a surreal climax he turned to a television camera to declare: "The more rights you have [for women] it is actually a bar on their employment. No self-respecting small business man with a brain in the right place would ever employ a lady of child-bearing age. That isn't politically correct is it? But it is a fact of life; I know because I'm a businessman.''

I just love that 'I know because I'm a businessman' - it's so easy to then hear him saying I didn't get where I am today... after it.

Still, one must go easy on them...it seems they've got all confused by the pressure of having to make decisions and stuff like that:

On the eve of their first visit to Strasbourg, UKIP suffered a public relations disaster with the suspension of their MEP, Ashley Mote, who had campaigned to clean up sleaze in Brussels. Mr Mote neglected to mention to his colleagues that he faces charges in court over alleged housing benefit fraud.

Now down from 12 to 11 MEPs, UKIP took their seats among a group called Independence and Democracy whose members' views range from mild eurosceptism to UKIP's desire to leave the European Union.

The bloc of 33 MEPs includes the respected veteran Danish Eurosceptic, Jens-Peter Bonde but members are also drawn from Poland's ultra-right League of Families, several of whose members are on record with anti-Semitic or xenophobic comments. While hostile to Brussels the League also argues for the EU to stump up more cash for Poland's farmers.

Such inconsistencies are unlikely to trouble UKIP which yesterday moved into reverse gear on a number of its early pledges. Mr Kilroy-Silk left observers in confusion as to whether he and his 10 colleagues will play any significant role in the workings of the Parliament.

Gone was an early pledge to "wreck'' the Parliament and in its place came more measured rhetoric. He surprised many when he argued: "I respect that this is a directly elected European Parliament of 25 Nations'' and added that he did not want to "destroy or dismantle the Parliament''.

Although he does not initially intend to sit on a Parliamentary committee, that possibility has not been excluded and UKIP will take up seats on at least nine of them.

Meanwhile an early threat to boycott Strasbourg altogether appears to have disappeared. "I might attend every single plenary session'' he said prompting the joke that, if he continues to change his mind at this rate, UKIP may soon be advocating British membership of the European single currency.

Mr Kilroy-Silk's commitment to transparency appeared less than complete. When asked whether he will make public his declaration of members' financial interest he was non-committal. "If I feel I don't want to I won't,'' he said tartly.

I'm wondering whether it's worth having a sweepstake on which will implode in a fire of insults, arrogance, mud-sling, recriminations and political ineffectiveness first - UKIP or Respect? Place your bets!