I tell you there are no Liberal Democrats in Hartlepool! None! We have destroyed them all!

Welcome to the world of Comical Tommy:

Earlier today, I saw liberaldem activists wandering around in Hartlepus forcing children and animals to eat drugs. It is true I tell you.

This is just typical of the depths that the liberaldems have sunk. The city is covered with their graffiti and they beat up old women. They're mothers are whores, and sons of whores.

The Labour have a simple policy on drug abusers - we will lock them away and throw away the key! They are worse than vermin - everyone can see that. It is common sense policies like that that make Tony Blair the conqueror that he is. All praise him!