The General Council of Monty Python have today rejected moves to enable women to become directors of Monty Python films. This comes twenty years after it was agreed that women could attempt to tell jokes on screen, but were not allowed to ascend to the position of director.
Hopes had been high that women would be allowed to achieve this status, however opponents had pointed out that the holy texts had made it perfectly clear that women were only allowed to direct if they were portrayed by Terry Jones in drag. The Forward in Farce group – which opposed women telling jokes, feeling their role is clearly defined in the sacred texts whilst rejecting Fawlty Towers as mere apocrypha – celebrated the result today.
However, a majority did vote in favour of the move, including overwhelming votes in the House of Upper Class Twits and the House of Gumbies. A majority of the House of Fans was in favour of the change, but did not achieve the two-thirds majority required under the rules (designed by the Silly Party).
“My brain hurts.” A member of the House of Gumbies said after the vote. “Other comedies have women directors, but not the Python? Need brain surgeon.”
In other news, the Church of England’s credibility has passed on, is no more, has ceased to be, has expired and gone to meet its maker. Bereft of life, it rests in peace. Its metabolical processes are of interest only to historians. It’s run down the curtain and joined the choir invisible.
(If this made no sense to you, watch the video below)